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Sunday, January 26, 2014

Great Quotations that Aren't

The Bigger They Are,
The More Likely You'll Get
an Ass-Whupping
Anything that doesn't kill you outright, will probably leave you emotionally scarred for life.

A bird in the hand is likely to claw and peck until you let go.

If you can't beat them, slip risin into their coffee and they'll never know what hit them.

The bigger they are, the more likely you are to get an ass-whupping.  In fact, the "they" part of that is especially troubling.  Just how big are they and how many?

You can't fight city hall; you can only phone in bomb threats and hope they see the error of their ways.

Be careful what you wish for.  For example, wishing to find a kodiak bear in your bedroom is a really big mistake.

Blood is thicker than water, which is why you should probably hydrate with water unless you're a vampire or something.

Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater, so when you're throwing out the bathwater and there's something lumpy in there that screams, it's probably a baby.

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