Wednesday, June 03, 2015

Presidential Losers #20: Horatio Seymour

Following the Civil War everyone seemed to be in a grumpy mood; it was like the whole nation woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  

Ulysses S Grant, who neither sought the nomination nor made any effort to campaign, had nevertheless outlined a detailed post-war policy which ran thus: “Let us have peace.” 1 This seemed to make good sense, but Democrats weren’t having it.  

During the campaign, Republicans stuck to important issues of the election, pointing out that Horatio’s dad committed suicide and therefore it was a sure thing Horatio himself was a loony, and you’d better vote for Ulysses unless you wanted a nut-job picking flowers off the wallpaper in the Oval Office.  (The beard alone is enough to make you doubt his sanity.  What was he thinking?)  

In spite of these soundly-reasoned arguments, the popular vote was alarmingly close as far as Republicans were concerned: 3,013,650 for Grant, and 2,708,744 for Seymour.  

What’s worse, Horatio won New York, which the Republicans never saw coming.  Had women been allowed to vote, the election might well have gone to the Democrats. 2 

After this, Republican campaign managers learned their lesson and concentrated less on personal attacks in future elections, sticking to the tried-and-true method of voter fraud.

Result

Ulysses S Grant: 214
Horatio Seymour: 80

1. Supporters loved pointing out Grant's initials were "US."  They were also "UG."

2. In the assault of Cold Harbor alone, casualties were 52,000 Union Soldiers and 37,000 Confederates, meaning a potential 89,000 widows champing at the bit to vote for Seymour.