I Heart Indies

Monday, September 15, 2014

The Epistle of Netflix

One that watcheth may watch all things; another who has to get up in the morning watcheth only some.  Let not him that watcheth despise him that watch not for he has to get up in the morning; and let not him that watcheth only some despise not him that watcheth all; for Netflix welcomes all.

Who art thou that judgest another man's television show?  To his own television show he sit down or lieth.  Yea, he shall stay up, for the television show is able to make him watch.

One man esteemeth Orange is the New Black above House of Cards; another man esteemeth both alike.  Let every man be persuaded in his own mind.

He that watcheth Orange is the New Black, watcheth it on Netflix; he that watcheth instead Sponge Bob, on Netflix doth he watch it.  He that watcheth House of Cards, does so on Netflix, for he render Netflix his monthly subscription; and he that watcheth Parks and Recreation, on Netflix does he watch it and render unto Netflix his monthly subscription.

For no television can watch itself, and no television can turn itself off because it has to get up and go to work in the morning to pay the monthly subscription.  For when we watch, we watch on Netflix, and when we pay our subscription, we render unto Netflix; working or watching, therefore, we are Netflix's.

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