|Actually my dentist would find it very hard to|
Apart from my teeth, however, if my dentist had to identify me, he'd have a pretty hard time. For all he knows, all I do all day is lie stretched out, my mouth open wide as a wagon wheel, because that's the only way he ever sees me. I'm not sure he'd recognize me with my mouth closed. Also, my dentist believes I am extremely interested in sports. This is because whenever he talks about sports, I'm making gurgles of agreement, like, "Urghh-urghh... gurghh... ayagh." He thinks I'm saying. "Yes, I definitely agree. Bynum would be a fool to pass up a $24 million offer from the Cavs." Actually, I'm just saying, "Urghh-urghh... gurghh... ayagh." He also thinks I strongly agree with his political views. Not that I disagree with them, I just don't have political views. I tried having political views one time; it didn't work out.
So all in all, it'd be pretty easy throwing the cops off track if I ever had to fake my death: they'll be looking for a guy who lies down all the time with his mouth hanging open who's crazy about sports. Now if I could only get rid of my teeth.
Not flossing should take care of that.