Aroused to Action: Pastor Offers to Be Fox's "Spiritual Mentor"

Pastor Merle "Bubba" Ornucks has publicly offered to be the "spiritual guide" to Megan Fox after hearing of her Esquire interview in which she recalled her upbringing in the Pentecostal Faith, including speaking in tongues, and lamented her celebrity as sexual eye candy, complaining, "I felt powerless in that image... because I wasn't anything.  I was an image.  I was a picture."

Fox: "Tired of being an image."

Fox (pictured right) also said she began speaking in tongues at age eight, and "finds comfort in going to church."  It was these latter remarks that drew the attention of Pastor Ornucks.

"I can tell Megan is on a spiritual journey," Ornucks said.  "And I want her to know, the journey stops here.  Last stop, Ornucks."  [Pointing to self with thumb.]

"I'm pretty much willing to whittle down my whole congregation to just her," Ornucks offered.  He is the pastor of the Have a Blessed Day True Gospel Church, recently relocated to the Motel 6 off Highway 68, just across from the Waffle House.  Saying that he wanted to "reintroduce her to tongues." "It's good when you're eight, it's a whole lot better now."  He also said he had some plans for "laying on of hands" and "anointing with oil."

"I'm planning to take her to Heaven," Ornucks said.  "If she'll let me."