Thursday, December 20, 2012

Other Extinct Species


The Rotary-Dial Ant: Insectivorus Belltelephonicus once fed on the nutritious micro-fungus that grew in the finger-holes of rotary-dial phones.  Put under severe pressure by the introduction of push-button phones, the ant was listed as "critically endangered" by the turn of the century, a few hundred individuals managing to eke out their existence in the button cracks of Blackberries; the introduction of the Smartphone was the final blow.


The VCR-Rewinder Skink: The last of the Turntable Skinks having disappeared in the latter third of the last century, a few specimens evolved to adapt to life in rewinders for VCR tapes and flourished, their gorgeous coloration and their mating cry "takka-takkity-takka-takk" were common in households throughout the land.  The appearance of DVDs and Blue Ray sent them the way of the Eight-Track Salamander and the Cassette-Tape Vole.


The Bookstore Sloth: At one time great herds of these magnificent beasts could be seen roaming the aisles from Walden to Barnes and Noble; although still around, their numbers are sadly diminished as the internet has encroached on their former browsing grounds and except for a few stuffed examples in private collections (available on Ebay starting at $250) these creatures are rarely seen.