Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Outtakes from Aesop's Fables

Once the tortoise and the hare decided to have a race.  At the beginning of the race, the hare ran very fast and soon left the tortoise far behind.  When he looked back and saw the tortoise had barely left the starting line, the hare said to himself, "Ho-hum, that silly tortoise will never beat me!" and he lay down and took a nap.  While the hare slept, the tortoise kept on going, slowly, steadily, slowly, steadily, towards the finish line.  When the hare woke up, he discovered that the tortoise was still far behind him, so he got up and finished the race in a walk.  The tortoise wasn't even close.
Moral: Hares are a hell of a lot faster than tortoises.

Once there was a carefree grasshopper and a hard-working ant.  The grasshopper fiddled and played all day during the summer, while the ant laboriously gathered food and put it in his cellar.  "Why are you working so hard, Brother Ant?" asked the grasshopper.  "It's a beautiful day, and there's plenty to eat."  "I'm storing food for the winter," the ant explained, not pausing in his labors.  "When the leaves fall from the trees, and food is scarce, you'll wish you'd been more industrious."  But the carefree grasshopper paid him no heed, and continued to play and sing the summer away.  But when summer ended, and the leaves fell from the trees, the weather began to turn colder.  The first frosty morning, the grasshopper died so it didn't matter that he'd been lazy all summer, because food wasn't an issue anyway.
Moral: Grasshoppers almost never starve to death.  They freeze.

Once there was a hungry fox who saw some grapes growing high on the wall.  He jumped and tried to get the grapes, but failed.  So he tried again.  He failed again.  He jumped and jumped, but the grapes were always out of his reach.  Finally when he was tired and panting, he said to himself, "Ah, I don't want those grapes anyway.  They're sour!"  Just then, though, a crow flew down to eat the grapes and a few fell on the ground where the fox could get them.  He tasted one, and you know what?  It really was sour.
Moral: Foxes don't like grapes.  Crows do.