I Heart Indies

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

How Do You Come Up With These Ideas

"How do you come up with all your ideas? is what concerned Americans want to know.  Another thing they want to know is why I keep coming up with them.
When you consider my busy schedule - bon vivant, crime fighter, adored idol of millions - one is astounded that I'm able on top of all this to write a daily blog of such sparkle and effervescence.  "Don't you ever just want to stay and bed and sleep?" people ask, "And wouldn't we all be better off?"
First thing I do, is get up and turn on the computer.  This is essential, and I cannot stress this enough.  You can type and type all day, but if your computer isn't turned on, you're just living in a fool's paradise.  Then, once the computer is on, I usually play a few games of computer solitaire.  Some people shilly-shally before getting down to computer solitaire, but not me.  "A shirker never wins," is my motto.  "And potatoes planted in May are au gratin by June."  So when it comes to playing solitaire, I get right down to business.
But finally I open up my blog and hit the little pencil icon that shows I want to write a new post.  This is very odd because you don't write blogs with a pencil, and if you did, it wouldn't work very well.  The icon might as well be a pair of hedge-clippers or a crescent wrench.  But I digress.  Once I am looking at the snowy expanse of unwritten blog space on my computer screen, then begins, as Shakespeare puts it, the tempest to my soul.  There are a few things on this earth that truly terrify me: those big black cockroaches that scoot out from under something and run straight at you, global warming, and white space waiting to be written on.  At this point I usually do some cussing.  Then I visit all the other blogs I know, and see what they're writing about.  If I don't find anything I can stea...  Ahem, I mean, if I'm still not inspired, I go back to cussing.  If that doesn't work, I play some more computer solitaire.  Sooner or later, I come up with something, and with a feeling of relief and creeping self-loathing, I write it.
I hope this answers your questions.
Now I'm going to play some computer solitaire.

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